Nigerian Movies! Oh gosh...there's a lot I could say about them. But we'll be here forever, so I'll only touch on some typical-ness! I've been watching Nigerian films since I was a baby and I've seen all sorts. From the romance, to comedy, to action, to horror. And those of you that have watched Nigerian films, know that they love to repeat the story-lines with a little twist. So they become predictable. We know what happens from beginning to end, from when the film eventually starts. Not gonna lie though, Nigerian films have come a long way and have slightly improved. But then I guess it depends on the actresses and actors they use, because some are really good, some are just...let's just say I don't understand how they got into the film industry :/.
When I was younger, my Mum usually watched the religious ones, the ones that had a lot of scary looking witches and wizards and that one Baba that people would go seek advise and rituals from, from within the forest. These films used to SCARE me! Like I'd probably cry, but then I was young. I didn't know that they only used white, red or black paint to cover their faces, black cloths to cover their bodies and what some typical Nigerians would call 'film trick' to show magical powers. There was one in particular that had like a 1000 parts to it called (and I don't know the spelling) 'ABARANLA'...This movie SCARED the heck out of me! There was always this person betrayed as the devil that would just pop up in the forest and move about like he was an alien and say all sorts; I think he was chanting for like 20 minutes in the beginning of the film and then quickly disappear into thin air. It sounds really dumb, but as a kid, this gave me nightmares, ha! I hated Nigerian horror movies as I grew up, because I knew how FAKE it looked and it was obvious as to what equipment they used to TRY and make it look scary. Now you've got witches under water like THE GREAT MISTAKE which also had sooo many parts and you get like cults and the list goes on.
An annoying aspect of Nigerian films is the amount of time they WASTE when it comes to starting the movie. LIKE FOR REAL, this REALLY bugs me! When you buy Nigerian DVDs, I know you people that buy them don't buy just ONE DVD right? There's like Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and maybe Part 4. -_-. Why? Well, firstly even though some Nigerian movies have moved on from this nonsense; some STILL have that annoying rainbow of colours at the beginning with the long squeeky sound...God knows why. Then the ADVERTS. And Oh My Days, the adverts take up to an hour of the DVD with someone (usually a man) SHOUTING probably in Yoruba advertising the 'coming soon' films. This actually gives me a headache. Then as if you haven't waited a while already, when the film finally starts, the credits take another 30 minutes with the most annoying music that they've created SPECIFICALLY for the film e.g. *in song* 'Angelina has no home, she cheated, she lied, she suffered...Angelina has no home', so basically the intro music has already told you what happens in the film. THEN THE FILM FINALLY STARTS.
Another thing. You can't even hear the actors or actresses lines half the time. Why? Because the producers of the film, feel the need for music to be played every two minutes and it's louder than what the actors are saying. Goodness sake. And has anyone noticed that the producers of Nigerian films are addicted to the likes of Westlife and Celine Dion? Sometimes Joe? Like there are NO other artists in the world?
This one right here, cracks me up. You ever get those heated scenes in the action type films, where for example the husband and wife are arguing and all of a sudden the husband slaps the wife in which they use sound effects to make it seem more dramatic...and then what happens? She falls on the floor, fakes a heart attack and dies... How on earth do you die instantly from a slap? Can someone explain this to me...please. Then you get the LONGEST scenes ever when someone dies and they have like 30 minutes showing the family mourning and the aunts with their drama queen crying and shouting and falling all over the place or in the romantic films when they show the man and woman in various places being all lovey dovey (usually on the beach, maybe on a horse...?!)
The endings of Nigerian films. The majority of them? EPIC FAIL. That or it's just predictable. The endings get on my NERVES! There's literally only ONE film that I'm satisfied about, but the rest. FAIL. They end it in a way that it makes no sense or you just feel that the film hasn't really ended and you feel there should be another part, there probably is, but you can't find it...so you basically wasted two hours trying to figure out the outcome and you get no answers. Very frustrating. And then to top it off, they; without fail, say WE GIVE GOD ALL THE GLORY...*Sigh*
All these aspects of Nigerian films, although frustrating, it's also what we love about them. It's kind of hilarious and typical, but we gotta love some of the actresses and actors they use. We have some favourites: (In this order: Stella Damascus, Ini Edo, Genevieve Nnaji, Omotola, Mercy Johnson, Desmond Elliot, Pat Attah, Richard Mofe-Damijo) The list goes on! We have many talented Nigerian actors and actresses and despite the funny habits of Nigerian films; I'm very proud to be Nigerian!
Happy Nigerian Independence Day! x
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